Set Backs…

What. Is. Happening?

Before the end of the las school year, I was sick. I do not get sick very often, but when I do I feel like it goes on forever. It started with my children having strep and the horrible cough. We were all swabbed and tested for all things. I have never had a positive test for the flu or covid, and I haven’t tested positive for strep since I was a little kid. I did my very best to allow my body to fight it off, but I went downhill quickly. I ended up having to get antibiotics for bronchitis and a steroid shot to open my airway. I never even had a fever, but I could not breathe, which is a problem….

I had no issues taking care of my children when they had this crud. But trying to sit still and allow my body time to heal was pretty difficult. We homeschool several days a week, so I am responsible for making sure my healthy kids are staying active too. I did not want to do Anything. So, thats exactly what I did… as little as possible. I would do little things and tell myself that “tomorrow would restart my usual habits”. I did not start tomorrow…. or the next day…. or the next. I was sliding down that infamous “slippery slope” with my excuses holding my hand. 2 weeks later, I felt awful.

Realization

My reality in that moment was that I had stopped moving entirely. I stopped drinking water throughout the day or eating anything with any nutritional value. My thoughts started going darker and darker until I was basically a fluffier, angrier version of myself. I hated it. The hardest part for me is realizing when I have become my own enemy. Then the guilt….. Ohhhhhhhh the guilt will always sit with me when I’m really busy allowing my mind to spiral.

While I was feeling sorry for myself, I started googling “set backs” [see also: procrastinating]. One result hit me like a gut punch…. Im going to give you the overview of the article – It called the psychological definition of “set back” = Ego Depletion. It then went on to explain that when a person is struggling, self control becomes a limited resource. My mind was blown. I probably didn’t get the actual definition of everything, but the way I interpreted that article made perfect sense…. I practice yoga everyday because it makes me feel better, and the more I do it, the easier it is. But it takes more discipline to do it when it’s hard, and my ego doesn’t like hard.

Now what?

I frequently look to Pslam 94:18-19 (When I thought, “My foot is slipping,” your steadfast love, O Lord, held me up. When the cares of my heart are many, your consolations cheer my soul.) to remind myself that God can take those burdens and redeem my laziness for progress. Being still IS productive. Conscious rest is sabbath, and necessary. But I needed to refocus my mind if I were going to climb out of my own funk. So I started studying my own Yoga Notes and made a meal plan for the upcoming week. It wasn’t much, but it took little physical exertion, and got my mind focused on me rejoining my life.

Honestly, it took several weeks to come back from this one. But I came back. Set backs are as much apart of life as successes. We just don’t like to celebrate failures, or coming back from a failure in life. I always lean towards the underdog. There’s nothing I like more than watching a team convert on 3rd and long… so I will forever encourage anyone to just do the work. The beauty is in it.

If you would like to get started improving your mobility, please visit my website and join me for classes. www.kindredyoga.org

God Bless!